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ENJOY EMOTIONAL FREEDOM, PERSONAL POWER, AND INNER HEALING USING THIS PROVEN PATH TO GENUINE FORGIVENESS
If your attempts at being a forgiver haven’t worked … or you know you need to forgive but you simply don’t want to … it’s time you discover how real forgiveness works
Real forgiveness honors you—it recognizes the pain you suffered and what you lost because of another person’s actions.
Real forgiveness empowers you to want to exchange your anger, frustration, and resentment for relief, freedom, grace, and peace.
Real forgiveness heals you from the inside out.
Have you been hurt … deeply hurt … by someone you loved and trusted?
Maybe your spouse had an affair that you just found out about. This devastating news not only shakes the foundation of your marriage, it also makes you feel like a fool because all this time you had no clue.
Or maybe you shared something with your best friend in confidence … only to find out later that she betrayed your trust.
Or maybe you were physically, sexually, or otherwise abused as a child by a parent, a stepparent, or other relative. Or were simply neglected and unloved. And these experiences still cause you a lot of pain.
Or you and your family or extended family don’t get along because some conflict has unraveled the fabric of your relationships.
Or maybe some things were said in anger between you and your business partner that is killing both the partnership and your friendship.
Time doesn’t heal wounds … forgiveness does
Situations that bring forgiveness into play are as varied as the people involved.
Yours is different from mine. And mine is different from my neighbor’s.
But the wound to the soul that we suffer as a result is the same for us all … in that it must have the right attention and treatment in order to heal.
Otherwise the infection of a toxic, unforgiving attitude takes root and begins destroying our primary relationships and poisoning our spirit … and even in time robs us of physical health and strength.
It’s not much different than what would happen if you cut your leg so badly that it requires medical attention—stitches, dressing, and antibiotic—to heal properly and for you to regain full use of your leg.
In the same way that such an injury could be potentially life-threatening if left unattended, damage done to your spirit by another can also undermine both your psychospiritual and physical health if unforgiveness is allowed to take root.
As Dr Mike puts it, the old saying “time heals all wounds” is as absurd as it is inaccurate. In just as many cases the passing of time doesn’t heal the wound, it corrupts it, causing the infection to spread.
Try to forget … or truly forgive?
Nobody likes to acknowledge they’ve been hurt.
Which is why it often seems to make more sense to try to ignore, discount, or even attempt to forget the pain that person caused you.
After all, “what’s done is done,” we reason.
What happened can’t “unhappen.”
So the sooner you relegate that experience to your past and move on, all the better—you keep telling yourself.
But the problem is … that approach just doesn’t work.
And if you think about it, your own history bears that out.
Forgiveness can be hard … but unforgiveness is harder
Besides what it does to your mental and emotional wellbeing, did you know that an unforgiving spirit also negatively affects your physical health?
An abundance of research documents this fact.
Here’s just one example…
Failing to forgive, or unforgiveness, [has] unproductive outcomes for the [unforgiver], such as increased anxiety, depression, elevated blood pressure, vascular resistance, decreased immune response, and worse outcomes in coronary artery disease.[1]
So the physical benefits alone should be reason enough to want to learn how to effectively forgive.
But if you’re a fellow Christian, you really don’t have an option.
The overriding reason we can’t allow ourselves to harbor a spirit of unforgiveness is because we are commanded by Christ himself to forgive, as every believer knows (Luke 6:37).
So let’s assume you believe Scripture is true … and you try to practice what it teaches.
In this case, you’ve most likely tried to forgive the person who wronged you.
And tried.
And tried.
Not only have you told God you forgive them, you may have also told that person.
But instead of feeling better—relieved and free—you feel just the same as before. Or even worse.
(Reason being, you may now also feel guilty because after “forgiving” them, you still have the same attitudes and feelings toward them. In fact, you may secretly still want them to suffer for what they did to you.)
What all this means is that you’re tangled up in the forgiveness knot. (More about that later…)
So for the Christian who needs to forgive … learning and implementing the stages of forgiveness are essential.
Real forgiveness supports a healthy self-love
You might be thinking…
But what if I don’t want to forgive them?
You don’t know what they did to me.
You don’t know how bad it hurt. How it destroyed my life.
So it doesn’t seem right … or fair … that I just forgive them for that. That makes me look weak. Or like my feelings and my pain don’t matter.
In fact, I don’t think they deserve my forgiveness.
First of all, I applaud you for being so honest.
And you’re exactly right.
I don’t know what they did to you, how bad it hurt, or how it negatively affected your life.
But I DO know this—and I know it beyond any doubt …
Working the stages of forgiveness never discounts your experience of being wronged.
In fact, this proven path to forgiveness promotes and completely supports self-care and a healthy self-love.
It allows your authentic thoughts, feelings, and attitudes surrounding your experience of being wronged to be recognized and heard.
In moving through the stages of forgiveness you will be honoring yourself. You will never feel dismissed or disregarded.
Further, you will discover in the process that the choice to forgive is a choice of power, not weakness.
Finally, you’ll understand why you feel like your perpetrator doesn’t deserve your forgiveness. (You’re right, by the way!)
And you’ll learn how to respond to those feelings from an emotionally and spiritually healthy place
SO …
Just to be clear, you don’t have to want to forgive before you take the first step.
You don’t have to be ready to forgive to get started. Not by any means.
That’s the beauty of this process.
What is that grudge costing you?
I encourage you to ask yourself…
What internal consequences do I continue to suffer by holding onto this grudge?
What relational damage is my unforgiveness causing?
In short, what is it costing me to continue on in unforgiveness?
Is it really worth it?
For the person who chooses to forgive… who has the wisdom to know the cost of unforgiveness is just too high … learning and implementing the stages of forgiveness is a lifesaver.
Without forgiveness hurt people continue to suffer
But unfortunately it doesn’t stop there …
Hurt people end up hurting other people.
We humans are funny, aren’t we?
We know the pain unforgiveness brings to ourselves … and the harm it causes in our relationships … and yet we continue on in unforgiveness!
Why do we do that?
Forgiveness can be confusing!
Unfortunately there is so much confusion surrounding forgiveness.
Especially as a believer, it’s so easy to get trapped between a biblical truth (the command of Christ to forgive) and your personal truth (your authentic thoughts, feelings, and attitudes regarding the wrong that was done to you).
Or to put it more simply, you get trapped when you …
rush to forgive before you’re anywhere near ready to forgive.
AND IT JUST DOESN’T WORK.
It can’t.
Because we are not only spiritual beings … we are psychological beings as well.
Which means not only should I consider what Scripture says about forgiveness, but I also have to factor my own psychological realities into the process.
That’s what makes this newly-released course from Growth Resources Online, Untangling the Forgiveness Knot, the best answer for the confusion, frustration, and lack of success that comes with trying to forgive someone who has wronged you.
Untangling the Forgiveness Knot addresses both the spiritual and the psychological aspects of forgiveness in one place as it is based on a model that is both biblically and psychologically sound.
Untangling the Forgiveness Knot…
- Reveals the litmus test that shows when forgiveness is called for and when it is not.
- Explains how you can actually make the situation worse by saying “I forgive you.”
- Demonstrates why you typically fail when you sincerely try to forgive.
- Identifies the key to getting unstuck when you can’t seem to or don’t want to forgive.
- Allows the healing of painful memories to begin.
- Shows you how to transform the pain and loss you suffered into a powerful, treasured dimension of your personality and story.
Though it’s been many years in the making, until now the 5 Stages of Forgiveness® has only been made available to individual clients of Growth Resources (our long-standing counseling practice).
Which means this is the first time we’ve offered it to the public in the form of a Growth Resources Online course.
An interactive experience
Here’s what you get when you register for Untangling the Forgiveness Knot:
THE COURSE
This course features evidence-based, results-oriented strategies from our decades of research and in-the-trenches experience with real world clients who have been where you are.
This means you get real help for real-life situations that bring positive, lasting changes to your life!
DIRECT ACCESS TO US
We are available to interact with you directly inside our private online community Monday through Friday at specified times for the first eight weeks of the course.
We also host weekly Q&A/group coaching sessions online during that same eight-week period.
COMMUNITY
This private “no judgment zone” is a safe place where you can ask questions, help one another, and share successes and challenges.
Being active in the community keeps you on track, connected, and motivated!
MEMBER PORTAL
Our user-friendly Member Portal allows you to fully participate and progress through the course—each week’s lesson and exercise (in both pdf and mp3 formats), downloadable worksheets, community access, and links to recordings you may have missed.
You Also Get These Bonuses When You Enroll Today!
In our experience of working with clients over a span of three decades, we realize that forgiveness is in play in only about half the cases.
So… what do you do when the issue at hand is not one that calls for you to forgive?
This GRO Short Course, Let It Go, will answer that question for you. It will also demonstrate just what you can do to in order to let go so you can finally move forward and leave the emotional baggage from the past behind.
If purchased separately: $47
It’s all too obvious how much COVID has impacted our lives. Any prolonged period of stress and change such as this can translate to a depressed immune system, problems with sleep, strained relationships, and lethargy.
If all these changes and challenges have left you feeling hopeless, fearful, anxious, unhappy, depressed, listless, etc., the practical strategies you’ll discover in this timely course will pick you up and get you back into your life with renewed confidence and peace!
If purchased separately: $197
One FREE full-length (30 min) personal coaching session with Susan is yours as part of this bonus package!
You choose the day and time that’s best for you on Susan’s calendar. And you also get to choose the topic, question, or particular challenge you want Susan to help clarify for you.
If purchased separately: $100
Untangling the Forgiveness Knot All-Access Pass
Lessons are dripped one per week for eight weeks.
All bonuses are available immediately upon subscribing, and you have unlimited access to this course and all bonuses associated with this offer as long as the GRO Member Portal is open and active.
This Untangling the Forgiveness Knot package is a pilot project for GRO, which means you get to take advantage of an unprecedented opportunity — one that will likely never be repeated — at a $700 discount!
When you enroll today, you receive this Untangling the Forgiveness Knot Package (valued at $997):
- Untangling the Forgiveness Knot course (lifetime access)
- 8 Weekly Group Coaching Calls
- Daily Access to Us inside the Community (8 weeks)
And a BONUS Package valued at $344 . . .
- Let It Go GRO Mini Course
- Breathing Thin Air GRO Course
- Full-Length (30-min) Coaching Session with Susan
ALL FOR A ONE-TIME INVESTMENT OF JUST $297!!
Total Savings $1,044
The Choice Is Yours
- Your wounded soul cannot heal
- Your physical health declines
- Your relationships suffer
- You remain in mental and emotional bondage to the person who wronged you
But…
- Your wounded soul begins to heal
- Your physical health rejuvenates
- Your relationships are restored
- You leave your painful baggage of the past behind in exchange for emotional freedom, personal power, and transformational grace and peace
If you’ve had enough of the toxin of unforgiveness robbing you of your emotional energy, your positive outlook, your good will and gracious attitude toward others…
If you’re worried that your physical strength and health are being systematically taken from you because of your current state of unforgiveness…
And if you’re tired of having your relationships damaged and even destroyed by unforgiveness…
… then it’s time to experience the difference real forgiveness can make in your life by joining us in Untangling the Forgiveness Knot.
Untangling the Forgiveness Knot All-Access Pass
Lessons are dripped one per week for eight weeks.
All bonuses are available immediately upon subscribing, and you have unlimited access to this course and all bonuses associated with this offer as long as the GRO Member Portal is open and active.
Our Word of Honor to You:
If you are not completely satisfied with the return you are getting from your investment in this GRO Course, we want you to let us know!
We are fully vested in exceeding your expectations for the duration of this course and are committed to doing everything we can to insure and support your success.
For this reason, rather than refunding the price you paid for the course, we offer you the opportunity to apply the cost of your course to individual coaching sessions for a more strategic, personalized approach.
PLEASE NOTE: Because we are confident in the proven techniques we offer, we do not offer monetary refunds. Rather we allow you to transfer the price you paid for the course to the equivalent in individual coaching sessions.
[1] Forgiveness: How it Manifests in our Health, Well-being, and Longevity, https://repository.upenn.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1124&context=mapp_capstone
Our Team
Dr. Michael Ruth, now in his 32nd year of private practice, is Board Certified in counseling, family therapy, life coaching, and NLP. He is author of three books and chief course creator for GRO.
Dr Mike holds degrees in history, theology, counseling, and religion and society.
He received the Chalice Award in recognition of outstanding doctoral research for his PhD dissertation – The Virulent Personality: A Proposal for the Clinical Classification of Pathological Evil as a Psychiatric Disorder.
Susan Ruth, co-practitioner in our private practice, is a Board Certified Life Coach as well as co-course creator for GRO. An award-winning educator, she holds a BS in Education and a Master’s degree in Counseling.
She has also ghostwritten five books on topics including personal achievement, biography and business, and spiritual development.
Susan specializes in helping parents grow emotionally healthy kids and helping you discover the treasures hidden in your personality and personal story.
Both Dr Mike and Susan are board certified in Applied Positive Psychology
Our team proudly carries the following certifications:
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